I'm just going to start with the recipe at the top so WordPress doesn't tease my blog with a triggering photo of my creepy basement. I think the last post's teaser photo was enough to make everyone bite down on their pillows and scream. Sorry about that. To make up for that, here's a picture … Continue reading It’s beginning to look a lot like B.F.D.
It's Thursday so, course, I've had it up to here with nonsense. One too many sightings of dudes explaining things to women on social media today, and now mommy's done. DONE. Dunzo. A lot of people are mad about "45" hosting Kanye in the Oval Office today for... some kind of truly unfortunate and awkward … Continue reading I have a headache and I’m cranky so buckle up.
On Monday I believe I promised to report back today with a full list of things I noticed about my children in the first half of the week. Since we had a total of nothing to do last night and Monday night, I'm happy to tell you I did not fill the time with extra … Continue reading My weird family
9-17-2018 6:43 p.m. Dearest, This may be my last missive regarding Florence as the hurricane-turned tropical storm/depression/flood has left us mostly unscathed except for a pretty soggy basement and a messy yard. And I didn’t forget you yesterday. Yesterday, I rested. As it turns out, I excel at doing nothing. I’ve got a jewelry box … Continue reading Letters from Florence, part 6
9-15-2018 9:38 p.m. Dearest, It’s too soon for cabin fever to rear its ugly head and yet I find myself getting annoyed at small things. The co-captain washed his hands in the sink and instead of immediately grabbing a towel, first chose to fling water off himself. “You got your hand-water in my socca batter,” … Continue reading Letters from Florence, part 5
9-14-2018 7:54 pm Dearest, Well, it finally has happened. After silently suffering year after year trying to transplant my Northern roots in a Southern state, I finally went full redneck. You would have had to judge for yourself in the moment, but at face value, it ticked off all the boxes. 1. Me, standing on … Continue reading Letters from Florence, part 4
9-14-2018, 10:18 a.m. Dearest, The muffins are horrible. But the enlistees are grateful for them, and have eaten more than half. I don’t know how the muffin mix manufacturer managed to omit “Barbie doll parts” from the ingredients list for coconut chia chocolate mix, but I suspect a massive government conspiracy that starts all the … Continue reading Letters from Florence, part 3
8-14-2018, 7:36 am Dearest, The anxiety baking has begun. I believe I read somewhere that during a hurricane, paleo adherents are allowed a ration of muffins. Bias confirmation is the new normal, after all. One of the senior officers had abandoned his post, but the co-captain is keeping him abreast of local developments via texts … Continue reading Letters from Florence, part 2
8-13-2018, 6:20 pm Dearest, We are yet 24 hours before the first of the rains, and I fear rations are already running low. Enlistee 1 has already eaten 1/3 of our supply of lunchmeat and Duke's, and Enlistee 2 is now asking for his third peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Mind you, one of these … Continue reading Letters from Florence