Letters from Florence, part 3

9-14-2018, 10:18 a.m.

Dearest,

The muffins are horrible. But the enlistees are grateful for them, and have eaten more than half.

I don’t know how the muffin mix manufacturer managed to omit “Barbie doll parts” from the ingredients list for coconut chia chocolate mix, but I suspect a massive government conspiracy that starts all the way at the top and trickles all the way back down to Ollie’s discount store.

Have returned to my usual meal of eggs & greens, I now have to clean the mess hall. I am actively looking for ways to procrastinate now.

In doing so, I checked in on the enlistees, who were enjoying their allotment of Pokémon cartoons. Trying to decide whether to address with them now or later the either overt misogyny and simple laziness in the portrayal of the Nurses Joy and Officers Jenny. The Pokémon universe gives every nurse and every police officer the exact same name, personality and appearance. A troubling realization.

Have decided to counter the effects of feminine stereotypes and overall obnoxiousness with an episode of Arthur.

Enlistee 1 retreated to practice his taekwondo moves in the dining room. This may or may not include pretending the punching target is my face.

That is the life of a senior officer. We didn’t come here to make friends.

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